Pumping Iron

What do "Head Like a Hole," "Welcome to the Jungle," and "Bad Boy for Love" have in common? As far as we can tell, nothing leaps out — other than getting your heart beating faster, your adrenalin pumping at dangerous proportions, and your head focused on one task and one task only: getting that 52-inch chest before you die. This was only a warm-up. Your playlist becomes a sadistic drill sergeant in Next Steps.

You've made it through the Basics, and you're still standing? Nice. Still, chances are, you're starting to tire out, which is why we're digging deeper into our playlist, pulling out the heart-attack tempo of Jet's "Are You Gonna Be My Girl," the bugged-out call-to-action of the MC5's "Kick Out the Jams," and the flat-out insanity of Disturbed's "Down with the Sickness." Work your biceps till they resemble condoms stuffed with honey-glazed walnuts, in Deep Cuts.

Here's where you'll need our pumped-up playlist the most, 'cause if you don't knock out that last set — if you grab your towel and wander back to your car — you'll hate yourself all day tomorrow. Allow Static-X's "Push It," Pantera's "Cowboys from Hell," or Slipknot's "Duality" to pump three final minutes of utter psychosis into your being. You're welcome . . .

Tuesday/Thursday Pilates class? Down the hall, first door on the right. Protein-powder-injected/84-vitamins-and-minerals-fortified smoothie? Smoothie bar downstairs. This? This here's the weight room, where a delicious Berry Blast beverage has no place whatsoever. This? This here's the playlist devoted to the weight room, where nothing else exists in your world except squeezing out that . . . one . . . last . . . rep. Think of Pumping Iron as your spotter — your mate getting you over that psychological hump, helping you get HUGE.