Obsessive, Intrusive, Magical Thinking
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- $15.99
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- $15.99
Publisher Description
'I FELT RECOGNISED ON EVERY PAGE, LEARNT SO MANY NEW THINGS, AND LAUGHED SO HARD I CHOKED ON MY WATER. READ THIS!!!' NAOISE DOLAN, AUTHOR OF EXCITING TIMES
'CANDID, WITTY ... A BRAVE BOOK THAT PUTS VULNERABILITY FULLY ON SHOW' INDEPENDENT
Obsessive was, still is, my natural state, and I never wondered why. I didn't mind, didn't know that other people could feel at peace. I always felt like a raw nerve, but then, I thought that everyone did.
Writer and journalist Marianne Eloise was born obsessive. What that means changes day to day, depending on what her brain latches onto: fixations with certain topics, intrusive violent thoughts, looping phrases. Some obsessions have lasted a lifetime, while others will be intense but only last a week or two.
Obsessive, Intrusive, Magical Thinking is a culmination of a life spend obsessing, offering a glimpse into Marianne's brain, but also an insight into the lives of others like her. From death to Medusa, to Disneyland to fire, to LA to her dog, the essays explore the intersection of neurodivergence, fixation and disorder, telling the story of one life underpinned and ultimately made whole by obsession.
PUBLISHERS WEEKLY
In this incandescent debut, journalist Eloise explores the nuances of being neurodivergent through a captivating mix of personal essays and cultural criticism. Eloise was diagnosed with OCD in her teens and later ADHD, autism, and Ehlers-Danlos syndrome, a connective tissue disorder that causes chronic pain. Starting with her childhood in the U.K., she revisits the fixations that "destroyed and sustained" her—from journaling in the 2000s as a young girl "to make time more elastic" to shoplifting in her teens and romanticizing Los Angeles, where she moved as an adult to pursue a writing career. As she lithely moves through time, she conveys her passion for art, nature, and pop culture: finding refuge from the "constraints" of her body and mind in the "weightlessness" of water, and begrudgingly accepting her love of Disneyland in "Yesterday, Tomorrow and Fantasy" ("against all logic... I have become the thing I feared: a Disney Adult"). In "I Am Old Now, But I Wasn't Then" a discussion about her obsession with mortality occasions a sharp analysis of the history of witchcraft to unpack cultural anxieties about death. Throughout, Eloise's wit and grace cast her differences in a dazzling light: "Understanding that... my brain is wired differently, has been key to not only knowing myself but also liking her a little bit, too." The result is a rewarding navigation through the corridors of a relentlessly curious mind.
