The Crescent
By Wicker & Crispin
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Podcast Description
very week me and Wicker do a podcast about celebrity gossip. We don't own a T.V. or read newspapers so gossip magazines are just about our only media influence It's not really about celebrity gossip it's us reading funny bits from the glossy magazines out to each other and taking the p**s - We love ourselves and we think we are well funny whatever anyone else says. NB > The opinions in the podcast are not necessarily our own - in fact: absolutely everything we say should be regarded as total bollocks. NB > The opinions in the podcast are not necessarily our own - in fact: absolutely everything we say should be regarded as total bollocks.
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1 |
ExplicitDisco Bitch and the price of fish | Disco Bitch and the price of fish is a post from: The Crescent > Celebrity Gossip Gone Wrong ~ A free weekly podcast OH GOSH SELECTAH – Gossip too dark for REAL We are joined by our special guest Joneslantic Airways for this the longest podcast we have ever done (at 64 minutes or something – s**t-the-bed) > That, my darlings, is just about double the usual Gossip > DOUBLE the usual sexeh problems >AND > Double the usual 1/2 cut self adoration and worthless bollocks. Jordan is on the edge (of course) > Amy from TOWIE is on the up > lots of celebrity tits for us to look at again > Bianca from Eastender’s Actress is EVER SO SLIGHTLY thinner than she was a couple months back (and I cannot begin to tell you how relieved we all are about that one) > Fat Gemma from TOWIE leddinitaaaalhangout > ALSO > I saw a thing in the paper about Pete Tong getting some restraining order against the lady who sings on unfinished sympathy because she has gone cuckoo and thinks they are married or something (but I forgot to mention it)… Plays out to 64A5R by Disco Bitch ~ which is the band what I am in (shameless self promotion OR too lazy to ask a band we like for PRS free use of a song?) More from Disco Bitch here: Twitter Facebook Soundcloud W**k us off on social media: | 12 8 11 | Free | View In iTunes |
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ExplicitReligion and Tits with The Smoking Hearts | Religion and Tits with The Smoking Hearts is a post from: The Crescent > Celebrity Gossip Gone Wrong ~ A free weekly podcast Well apart from Amy Winclaart’s tragic death tits and religion is all I can remember talking about… Kerry was in there somewhere though… so was ol Katie Price of course > something about Alex Reid and Chantelle Houghton and IVF > OH Alice in Chains and the SAUSAGE SONG > AMY? AMY? it’s Val – sorry I havn’t been round in a while… > >> Other stuff but not much… Gossip mags seem to be sacking all thier Agony Aunts so there is not nearly enough sexy problems for us to laugh at. Playing out to a track from Southend SuperStars ‘The Smoking Hearts’ tune is called Thundersludge http://www.myspace.com/smokinghearts \m/ W**k us off on social media: | 29 7 11 | Free | View In iTunes |
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Explicita scoop, a showdown, an unlikely alliance and Zoo Zero | a scoop, a showdown, an unlikely alliance and Zoo Zero is a post from: The Crescent > Celebrity Gossip Gone Wrong ~ A free weekly podcast We’ve been away for such a long long time neither of us have a clue about celebrity land. ‘course we muddle on through and find out about Cheryl, NatCas and Rhianna who are all heading for CERTAIN DISASTER – Kerry and Jordan to team up for a new desparate attempt to scavange a few quid off of some half arsed production company > Also > DOUBLE NOSE JOBS > Fern Cotton is turning into a Gran > TOWIE people getting told off > a woman who found love by not dressing up like a hooker > not enough sexy problems and we forgot to check the facebook wall for messages. We do have a new twitter account though – chirpse us up > @slebcast Playing out to one of our favourite bands Zoo Zero – track is called ‘Oh Dear’ More form Zoo Zero on Myspace, tumblr and soundcloud – here are some links: www.myspace.com/zoozero http://zoozero.tumblr.com http://soundcloud.com/zoo-zero W**k us off on social media: | 1 7 11 | Free | View In iTunes |
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ExplicitProstitutes, pregnancy and putting on weight | Prostitutes, pregnancy and putting on weight is a post from: The Crescent > Celebrity Gossip Gone Wrong ~ A free weekly podcast Welcome to what seems like almost the second podcast of the entire year…looks like cracks are appearing in our on air relationship (not really it was just jokes) GASP shock horror shrek rooney and a prossie – oh hang on that was last week. This week the wind changed on kerry katona and now she is stuck with a deirdre barlow neck gurn for life (your mother was right about the wind) In other news Jordan’s got a new money hungry male model boyfriend who she is treating to some posh teas in that london AND meanwhile she is having preparatory surgery so she can perform self c*********s all dem slebs are popping out dem babies – kelly brook > posh beckham > danielle lloyd > abby clancy > holly willoughby > nuff said AND THE ONES who haven’t got a bun in the oven are getting curvy> Crispin gives the latest on the weight gain: Holly Valance that skinny one from neighbours has puffed up right proper like a christmas turkey>another one of them > mel B or someone > gained three whole pounds-for gods sake someone get that woman to fatcamp. We meet the lady with the largest bobs in the whole wide world and the woman with the snake killing tits> it’s all happening right here I tell thee At the end we are really boring and laugh while watching a hilarious video of dancing from a variety show from the 80s>in retrospect maybe not so entertaining for listeners but right here you can see for yourself what we were laughing at so much http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=btV6M2xDe38 Playing out to the Liftmen and their song troubled teens. They are pretty cool you should listen> Wicker seen them live and EVERYTHING Laters Bambinos x W**k us off on social media: | 25 3 11 | Free | View In iTunes |
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ExplicitThe REAL Essex’s Next Top Wives’ Weddings On Ice | The REAL Essex’s Next Top Wives’ Weddings On Ice is a post from: The Crescent > Celebrity Gossip Gone Wrong ~ A free weekly podcast Oh crumbs – we had to record a new one because we checked after the fact and the one we did post pub on Thursday was mostly drunk silent reading and crisp eating… but we are back yes we are and welcome to our amazing lives. This is a sober one powered by tea and ginger biscuits WITH > Fleetwood Mac > Tina Malone STRIPPED BARE > Kate Middleton’s social network password SHOCKER > Kate Moss 8 dildo extravaganza > UNTOLD sexy problems as we read all the ones again that we couldn’t remember from when we did the drunk one… Playing out to ‘Eye on You’ by Ulysses who Wicker saw in Bristol the other day – find them on Myspace W**k us off on social media: | 9 3 11 | Free | View In iTunes |
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ExplicitAll that vajazzles is not Essex – Featuring ‘Thee Cuss Words’ | All that vajazzles is not Essex – Featuring ‘Thee Cuss Words’ is a post from: The Crescent > Celebrity Gossip Gone Wrong ~ A free weekly podcast Bit short on the old sexy problems ~ what with Vanessa not being in Reveal any more and Love it swapping Sharon Osbourne for a twee sensible couple but we get by and manage to go on for almost an hour about our beloved celebrity half wits ~ ENJOY YOURSELVES – we did courtesy of: Jordan phoning up random men for sexy talks > Mark saying he hopes Kerry breaks her neck > old celebrity fat faces > Celebrity Blind Dates > tips from Sam out of off of The only way is Essex’s next top wives wedding on how to pull ANY man > results from some big SEXY survey… …and some GIN and some BEER and some TABS Music from Thee Cuss Words ‘chyea, rright’ – we have never played a track before where the wave form on garageband was pretty much a rectangular block of sound LOVES IT More from Thee Cuss Words… Listen here: HTTP://THEECUSSWORDS.BANDCAMP.COM/ http://www.last.fm/music/Thee+Cuss+Words Find a show near you here: HTTP://SONGKICK.COM/ARTISTS/3823661-THEE-CUSS-WORDS Buy here: HTTP://THEECUSSWORDS.BIGCARTEL.COM/ They are playing at the British Wildlife Weekend Festival in Leeds first weekend in March > go see W**k us off on social media: | 11 2 11 | Free | View In iTunes |
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ExplicitThe Price of Gin and a Cat in a Lampshade | The Price of Gin and a Cat in a Lampshade is a post from: The Crescent > Celebrity Gossip Gone Wrong ~ A free weekly podcast It is all go here I tell yer > Wicker is back on the sauce > Jordan and Alex are on the rocks (WHO KNEW) > pics of Kerry and her new fella in a carpark (OF COURSE) > World’s fattest woman wants to eat herself > Take that Shocker > Gay Bride surprise > Kelly’s Luke beds Tranny … All sorts didn’t manage to get a band to play us out (again) – more suggestions please – we try and find cuss words on the internets for next week W**k us off on social media: | 28 1 11 | Free | View In iTunes |
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ExplicitZen and the art of of celebrity gossip | Zen and the art of of celebrity gossip is a post from: The Crescent > Celebrity Gossip Gone Wrong ~ A free weekly podcast New year. New Wicker > all yoga and zen. New year. Same Crispin > all booze and tabs. Some celebrity gossips, some disgusting real life stories and some sexy problems – you know the drill… IN PARTICULAR > Jordan ready to pull the plug on her relationship with Alex Reid (who knew?) > Kerry will never be a fat cow again > Katy Viesel’s Gran has the hump that her lucrative career in whoring has been ruined > something about EastEnders cot death *BABY ALIVE* > some fatty snapped her boyfriend’s cock off by riding him > Some bloke shagging his Gran > Someone nearly KILLED BY POO > ETC > ETC… Playing out to ‘Rare Earth Metals’ by Trogons – they have a tape coming out on Suplex next month…. follow them on twitter for deets. W**k us off on social media: | 18 1 11 | Free | View In iTunes |
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Explicitbaby ruth (christmas drunk) | baby ruth (christmas drunk) is a post from: The Crescent > Celebrity Gossip Gone Wrong ~ A free weekly podcast well well well this was supposed to go up for Crispmas but the internet was down and then I went on holiday. We can’t remember what we talked about and I don’t really want to listen to it to find out… …but at a guess i would say there was some fat celebs and some thin ones > a relationship crisis or two and some discussion of other peolpes sex problems. can’t remember if there is a song at the end either. oh well MERRY NEW YEAR heey yoooou guuuuys W**k us off on social media: | 7 1 11 | Free | View In iTunes |
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ExplicitParis Hilton’s odd shoe shocker | Paris Hilton’s odd shoe shocker is a post from: The Crescent > Celebrity Gossip Gone Wrong ~ A free weekly podcast FAR too much talking about ourselves at the beginning but celebrity gossip follows: N-E-W-S > some people are getting fat and some people are getting thin > Cheryl is plagued by doubts > Paris Hilton has only gone and left the house with odd shoes on (odd as in they were not from the same pair / not that they were a little strange like they were made from lego or fish or were alive for example > Mark and Kerry photographed in a supermarket car park again > pork scratching skin grafts > Carol McGiffin’s fella > lots of comments on our facebook wall and through twitter > nice jubbly…. > one lucky listener met Harry and Sam from the only way is Essex *BELIEVE* …send us some links to bands? or some celebrity sightings? @chimpdonk / @wickerwoo / Facebook Celebrity – ce·leb·ri·ty [suh-leb-ri-tee] –noun, plural -ties for 1. a famous or well-known person. fame; renown. ~ from Dictionary.com HTH W**k us off on social media: | 13 12 10 | Free | View In iTunes |
| Total: 10 Episodes |
Customer Reviews
I would buy this for a dollar
I have saved over £3.62 per week just by listening to "The Crescent" instead of buying celebrity magazines. YEOW!.
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