This Is Your Captain Speaking
A Novel
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5.0 • 1 Rating
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- $15.99
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- $15.99
Publisher Description
A PILOT, A JOURNALIST, AND A SEMEN TRAFFICKER WALK ONTO A PLANE . . .
When flight AW2921 crashes into the Hudson River and all 162 passengers survive, it’s a Monday morning miracle. What the rapturous public doesn’t know: the whole thing was staged as a last-ditch attempt at resurrecting the Air Wanderlust stock price.
Captain Hank Swagger piloted the miracle plane into the river. Disgraced TV news anchor Lucy Springer was “luckily” the only reporter on board, and the first to capture the story. Con man Normal Fulk recently faked his own death to escape the consequences of his barely legal career as a celebrity semen trafficker. Toting his last big score—the “John Lennon”—Normal has to leave it behind on the sinking plane or risk being identified and arrested.
In the aftermath of the crash and the chaotic week that follows, Lucy, Normal, and Captain Swagger are all about to discover what it means to be at the center of a miracle that is anything but.
PUBLISHERS WEEKLY
Methven's buoyant debut fictionalizes Captain "Sully" Sullenberger's emergency water landing, the renowned Miracle on the Hudson, and asks "what, if anything, it has to do with celebrity ejaculate," specifically John Lennon's. Fugitive semen trafficker Normal Fulk has smuggled a vial aboard the Air Wanderlust flight that Capt. Hank Swagger water-lands off Manhattan's Pier 66, bringing Fulk back into the viewfinder of Rory Genius-Temple, a violent thug and producer of the reality show Semen Pirates. While Swagger's heroics may reverse the airline's financial nosedive, his evacuation ass-slapping draws the suspicions of another passenger, Celebrity Twitter Beat anchor and Sandra Bullock look-alike Lucy Springer. Noting that the rescue is too orderly, the boats too swift, and the passengers too good-looking, Springer smells a hoax. As Fulk, Swagger, and Springer execute and sometimes botch their missions, a man called Blackie Spin sits in the shadows, pulling the strings. Fans of McSweeney's Internet Tendency will relish this frequent contributor's snappy farce about publicity, celebrity culture, and a ne'er-do-well's attempt to save some crippled orphans by way of one Beatle's frozen swimmers.
Customer Reviews
Great!
A fun, light, entertaining read.