The Lost Skeleton Returns Again

A VERY Mixed Bag

     

When I read that Larry Blamire and Co. had shot a sequel to "The Lost Skeleton," I was very excited and VERY apprehensive.
You see, since seeing the first "Lost Skeleton" in theaters, I fell in love with Blamire's sardonic "Faux-incompetent" writing style. The pace reminded me of all of the campy 50's and 60's Science Fiction films which were scribed by writers who "really thought that they were making a great story." Films like "Teenagers from Outer Space" and "Bride of the Monster" simply wreaked of passion and gravitas, yet were delivered with SUCH CHEESE that they've since become archetypes for "How NOT to write a screenplay." Watching the first "Lost Skeleton," I thought to myself, "Okay, this guy Blamire gets it... He knows his audience, he understands their expectations that the writing is trying desperately hard to take itself seriously, but fails so miserably that the result is hysterical." The "imaginary" 60's writer, desperate for work, down on his luck, penned "The Lost Skeleton of Cadavra" thinking that he was finally doing some good in the world. Blamire nailed it, because the film took such ludicrous material so seriously.

Now comes the apprehension.. "Did Blamire just get lucky with the first film? Was it just a fluke that he was able to channel a badly written cult film?" The answer, for better or worse, came out in the form of "The Lost Skeleton Returns, Again!"

There are moments during the film, specifically the black and white segment of the film before arriving at the Valley of the Monsters, where I thought, "Man, this is right on!" Specifically, as Dr. Paul Armstrong is first hysterically encountered in a South American bar, spewing embittered, self-pitying story-fragments about his lost days in the jungle; this made me think, "This is gonna rule! Blamire still gets it!"

The BIG UH-OH came for me in the form of the return of the lovable martian friends, Cro-Bar and Lattice. The moment that Lattice struggles to come up with a phony "Earth-Name" (a rehash of a "Lost Skeleton 1" gag) and begins stuttering, it dawned on me. "Oh boy, he doesn't get the material... This isn't supposed to be about looking for cheap laughs or sight gags. The audience "finds" humor from the characters and the writer NOT knowing OR ACTING like they're in such a stupid film!"
From this point on, everything in "Lost Skeleton 2" falls apart. The Valley of the Monsters, The Cantaloupe People, the Venus-Fly Monster eating Dr Flemming; all great concepts, but are worthless when placed in the context of the "trying to be silly and no longer caring about taking itself seriously" structure. The dialogue becomes so unbelievably bad (particularly the "Secret of the Double Negative" Bit... Yes Mr. Blamire, I listened to your commentary, you made the wrong choice with this one) and the logical jumps from one scene to the next are something that even the most desperate, down-on-his-luck, Pasadena screenwriter of made for TV movies in the 60's couldn't have come up with. I was irritated and frustrated that it seems Mr. Blamire didn't at all understand what made the first movie such a campy, fun, send-up.
The confrontation, or "final battle," between the Lost Skeleton and the Cantaloupe Monster was priceless, surprising, and very, very funny.
And as I've said, there are segments of dialogue that really hit me with a hard laugh. Sadly, though, the way the material is handled this time is just off-base with its audience. Looking for cheap laughs in the form of silly sets, long-winded eulogies, and better monsters is no substitute for a homage to all of the writers of the 50's, 60's and 70's who really were "giving it all that they had, and still managed to put out total garbage."

I will keep this film on my shelves, because I really like Bantam Street and the stuff that Blamire is putting out is guaranteed to be original and unique... But if you're looking for the same gloriously cheesy fun you may have encountered with "The Lost Skeleton of Cadavra," you may be disappointed. I would highly recommend checking out "Dark and Stormy Night," which I was just as excited about being released... That film is awesome.