The Berlin Patient
By Joel White
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In 2010 Joel and his girlfriend moved from Sydney to Berlin. After a month she left him and flew back home to be with a tattooed barista who was in a band. To try and win her back, he sent her over 90 minutes of audio recordings that contained horrendous anecdotes, Hollywood cliches and he even passed off Pearl Jam lyrics as his own. He recently found these files and instead of hiding the shame, he sat down with some friends, comedians and a therapist to analyse the lies, depression and desperation that a break up brings.
||ExplicitEpisode 10: The First Anniversary||The King’s Speech producer and Joel talk about how they did a similar thing to try and save a relationship. We also hear how Joel went crazy in Prague and wore makeup.||28 11 2017||Free||View in iTunes|
||ExplicitEpisode 09: I Forgot Her Name||In the final episode Joel reflects on what he learnt, then we listen to him drink some water, he reads a story and then it all literally breaks and falls in his lap.||19 1 2017||Free||View in iTunes|
||ExplicitEpisode 08: The Therapy Session||Want to know why Joel did all of this? So does he. Join him for therapy as he tries to get to the bottom of “Serious Joel”, wearing her socks and the pizzas.||7 12 2016||Free||View in iTunes|
||ExplicitEpisode 07: The Most Creative Lie Ever Told||Joel gives an Oscar winning performance that would make Kevin Spacey jealous. He then decides to start a barista cake delivery service.||29 11 2016||Free||View in iTunes|
||ExplicitEpisode 06: The French Novelist||In this episode, Joel meets a French novelist in Berlin soon after his girl abandoned ship in 2010. They talk about a range of topics including whether or not trying to find ‘the one’ is nonsensical.||22 11 2016||Free||View in iTunes|
||ExplicitEpisode 05: Stealing from Pearl Jam||Joel rips off Pearl Jam to try and hit an emotional home run. It falls flat and then he needs a hug.||15 11 2016||Free||View in iTunes|
||ExplicitEpisode 04: What’s up with Ex Girlfriends, Mum?||Strap in because we listen to a really bad stand-up comedy set Joel did about the break up in 2011. And then he chats to his mother about what happened and gets her thoughts on it all.||8 11 2016||Free||View in iTunes|
||ExplicitEpisode 03: How to Trick a Fortune Teller||Joel shows you how to never win a girl back as he tricks a fortune teller, gives you some fashion tips and analyses a diary that was left behind.||1 11 2016||Free||View in iTunes|
||ExplicitEpisode 02: Eating a Pizza While Wearing Her Clothes||Joel settles in to talk about cheap pizzas while wearing some of her clothes. He then hits an emotional home run by questioning if she’s used the special gift he bought her.||25 10 2016||Free||View in iTunes|
||ExplicitEpisode 01: Black Box Recording of a Break-up||In this episode, you’ll meet Joel, who thought it was a great idea to email his ex-girlfriend audio recordings to try and win her back after a plane crash of a breakup. Come and sift through the burning wreckage as we try to figure out what went wr||16 10 2016||Free||View in iTunes|
Too scared to let us listen without qualification
You hear about 2 sentences of his audio postcards per podcast. The rest is commentary. It must be hard to let people hear you at your worst and make their own judgement without you guiding that and trying to remind us that you know better now and that that's not you (now) but the show would be better for it. This is his attempt to recontextualise his personal history as evidently he can't rewrite/record it.
More of the good stuff
I downloaded this podcast after Leigh Sales gave it a plug in Chat10 Looks3. The concept is great and sporadically hilarious, but for the most part it feels like he is inflicting the same unnecessarily long-winded, self-indulgent monologues as he did on his poor ex-girlfriend. The difference being, she didn't ask for it. Tighten up the back story and give us more of the actual schadenfreude.
Great journey of a breakup and it's nice to experience honesty for once, especially coming from a man. I loved the therapist episode and also the French novalists take on love, would listen to those both again.