iTunes

Opening the iTunes Store.If iTunes doesn’t open, click the iTunes icon in your Dock or on your Windows desktop.Progress Indicator
Opening the iBooks Store.If iBooks doesn't open, click the iBooks app in your Dock.Progress Indicator
iTunes

iTunes is the world's easiest way to organize and add to your digital media collection.

We are unable to find iTunes on your computer. To download from the iTunes Store, get iTunes now.

Do you already have iTunes? Click I Have iTunes to open it now.

I Have iTunes Free Download
iTunes for Mac + PC

It’s Not Me, It’s You!

Impossible perfectionist, 27, seeks very very very tidy woman

This book is available for download with iBooks on your Mac or iOS device, and with iTunes on your computer. Books can be read with iBooks on your Mac or iOS device.

Description

‘I loved Jon’s book. It’s even better than the real thing because you can’t hear his voice.’ Michael McIntyre

A control freak looks for love (women who leave wet teaspoons in sugar bowls need not apply).

‘I haven’t woken up with a cup of tea by the bed for seven years. It seems such a small thing but it’s one of a thousand things I miss about having someone around to take care of me. I have spent my entire adult life getting things the way I want them and all I want now is someone to give it all up for.’

Is your filing faultless? Your CDs, apostrophes, cutlery all in the right places? Can you eat a biscuit in the correct way? Then Jon Richardson (single for seven years and counting) could be your ideal man…

Living alone in a one bedroom flat in Swindon, Jon has had far too much time on his hands to think. In fact to obsess. About almost everything. Jon’s obssessive compulsive personality disorder has seen him arrange the coins in his pockets in ascending size and colour code his bookshelves. It takes him less than 90 seconds to locate a receipt for a pair of shoes he bought in 1997. Over to the filing cabinet and R for receipts, S for shoes.

But Jon doesn’t want to be like this, in fact he would quite like to share his life with someone. But who could that someone be? Someone like himself, a quarrelsome perfectionist only with breasts and less body hair? Absolutely not. But who exactly is Jon looking for and where will he find her? Faced with a loveless future filled with his own peculiar quirks and perfectionism, Jon sets about his search for The One. The question is, will he mind her keeping the knives to the left of the forks in the cutlery drawer or organising the CDs by genre and not alphabetically?

Reviews

‘Richardson is an OCD-afflicted, grumpy young man who can spin a brilliant routine and could well be the best comic of his generation.’ The Herald

‘Boldly funny and expertly written, it’s a look at dark subjects deftly handled by an engaging comic talent.’ Shortlist

‘Written in his unique style, Jon's quest is a hilarious eye-opener into the mind of a neat freak.’ The Sun

‘I loved Jon’s book. It’s even better than the real thing because you can’t hear his voice.’ Michael McIntyre

‘Jon’s book is just like him. Funny, enjoyable and short.’ Alan Carr

About the author

Jon Richardson is a 28-year-old stand up comedian from Lancaster. His first solo Edinburgh show, concerning his OCD tendencies, was nominated for the Best Newcomer award at the 2007 Edinburgh Festival. His 2009 show about his resulting perfectionsim was nominated in the Best Show category. He lives in Swindon.

Customer Reviews

Very Good

Control freal !!! Jon would be appalled at the lack of correct spelling in the description (sorry I just really had to point that out)Very Good book.

Brilliant book

Really funny book and definitely worth buying. I can really relate to his problems, and it made me feel a lot better. Best book I've read in a while.

Funny

Enjoyed it. Recommended

It’s Not Me, It’s You!
View in iTunes
  • £5.49
  • Available on iPhone, iPad, iPod touch, and Mac.
  • Category: Humour
  • Published: 23 June 2011
  • Publisher: HarperCollins
  • Print Length: 304 Pages
  • Language: English
  • Requirements: To view this book, you must have an iOS device with iBooks 1.3.1 or later and iOS 4.3.3 or later, or a Mac with iBooks 1.0 or later and OS X 10.9 or later.

Customer Ratings

More by Jon Richardson