By Cerulean Games
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Dave Calabrese's App-a-Day #6: Ultimate Dungeon
Prepare to sharpen your sword and wear your... bacon? In the sixth app to come out of Dave Calabrese's "App-a-Day" Project, you become a mighty adventurer traveling through the strangest and most random dungeon ever!
While the game plays like an old-school text adventure, it is far from the norm. To play, you simply tap the screen. Your only decision - do I tap, or do I not? Do I risk continuing, which could lead to certain doom, or will it instead reward me with a plastic sword to fight with?
And the best part of Ultimate Dungeon is the Random Enemy Generator Code Thingy! You will almost never fight the same enemy twice thanks to a highly advanced and incredibly well thought out generator that tosses some dice and splices together a random enemy name. You will find yourself doing battle with enemies such as the Handdrawn Video Game Artist of Unfortunate Secrets using nothing more than an Old Gym Sock and some Wool Mittens.
Honestly, a fast moving, light-hearted text game with a visual user interface like this game teases could be fun. But all you do in this "game" is tap. You have NO options. Ever. If you come across a weapon or some armor, you automatically equip it, even if it's fifty times worse than what you already have. There's no choosing whether your character goes left or right. There's no inventory management. There's nothing here that qualifies this as a game.
If the developer ever decides to put some effort into this application, here's an idea. Find an already made text-adventure, add in your "random-silly-name-thingy", make some other humorous changes, classify your text version as a parody (legal use therefore, unless you already acquired permission), add in some other enhancments like a graphical interface for stats and inventory (drop down lists rather than item images so you can minimize the work and size), and you have a decent game.
Please end your "App-a-Day" terror campaign! I like a great many of your ideas, but they fail to deliver because they have no substance!
Not the worst
Just tap to find what you find or where you go. I agree that automatically equipping something that's worse than what you've already found is silly. Maybe add a line of "Since your current equipment is awesome, you hand this trash to the next noob who walks by you."
What's the big deal?
This game rocks. It is funny, it is not meant to be a super epic fast paced shooter or super long where the story goes nowhere. In fact, you don't need a story. It's just somthing to pass time.
- Category: Games
- Released: Jul 03, 2009
- Version: 1.0
- Size: 5.5 MB
- Language: English
- Seller: Cerulean Games
- © 2009 Dave Calabrese
Compatibility: Requires iOS 2.2.1 or later. Compatible with iPhone, iPad, iPod touch (2nd generation), iPod touch (3rd generation), iPod touch (4th generation), iPod touch (5th generation), and iPod touch (6th generation).