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Bite Me: A Love Story (Unabridged)

by Christopher Moore

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"The city of San Francisco is being stalked by a huge, shaved vampyre cat named Chet, and only I, Abby Normal, emergency backup mistress of the Greater Bay Area night, and my manga-haired love monkey, Foo Dog, stand between the ravenous monster and a bloody massacre of the general public. Whoa. And this is a love story? Yup. "'Cept there's no whining. See, while some lovers were born to run, Jody and Tommy were born to bite. Well, reborn, that is, now that they're vampires. Good thing theirs is an undying love, since their Goth Girl Friday, Abby Normal, imprisoned them in a bronze statue. Abby wants to be a blood sucking fiend, too, but right now she's really busy with other stuff, like breaking in a pair of red vinyl thigh-high Skankenstein® platform boots and wrangling her Ph.D.-candidate boyfriend, Steve (the love monkey). And then there's that vampire cat Chet, who's getting bigger and smarter - and thirstier - by the minute. Abby thought she and Steve could handle the kitty cat on their own, mais non." Before you can say "OMG! WTF?" Tommy and Jody are sprung from captivity, and join forces with Abby, Steve, the frozen-turkey-bowling Safeway crew, the Emperor of San Francisco and his trusty dogs Lazarus and Bummer, Abby's gay Goth friend Jared, and SF's finest Cavuto and Rivera to hunt big cat and save the city. And that's when the fun really begins.

Customer Reviews

This Book Will Make You Want to Do a Celebratory Booty Dance of Amazing Bookness

AMAZINGNESS! GENIUS! HILARIOUS! A sequel to a sequel that's just as outstanding as the original! OMG! This book totally rocked my stripey socks! Susan Bennett's narration makes the book truly come alive and though it may seem impossible to make Christopher Moore's words even funnier, she does! Her rendition of Abby is fantastic! And even if you haven't read the first two books, you can still follow along. There's a recap of the previous books a the beginning. And lastly, Moore once again brings in an old friend from one of his other fantastic books and you can't help but smile when you hear his very distinctive voice. Buy this book or Chet will get you, haha, j/k, lol!


I just DL'd the book tonight and I'm sooo excited to listen to it!! I've been waiting for this book since listening to the first 2 books. I'm rating it 5 s since the first 2 definitely deserved 5 s and I'm expecting this to be just as good.

Not Enough Stars!

There are not enough stars to properly rate this trilogy! It is definitely a 10! I swear, this is the series I want to see in movie form :)
Abby Normal is my favorite character of all! Mr Moore, if you ever read this, please have a few more adventures with Tommy & Allison.

Christopher Moore, Bite Me: A Love Story (Unabridged)
View In iTunes $19.95
  • Narrator: Susan Bennett
  • Published: 2010

Customer Ratings