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Beautiful You

A Novel

This book can be downloaded and read in Apple Books on your Mac or iOS device.


"A billion husbands are about to be replaced."

From the author of Fight Club, the classic portrait of the damaged contemporary male psyche, now comes this novel about the apocalyptic marketing possibilities of a new product that gives new meaning to the term "self-help." 

Penny Harrigan is a low-level associate in a big Manhattan law firm with an apartment in Queens and no love life at all. So it comes as a great shock when she finds herself invited to dinner by one C. Linus Maxwell, a software mega-billionaire and lover of the most gorgeous and accomplished women on earth. After dining at Manhattan's most exclusive restaurant, he whisks Penny off to a hotel suite in Paris, where he proceeds, notebook in hand, to bring her to previously undreamed-of heights of gratification for days on end. What's not to like? This: Penny discovers that she is a test subject for the final development of a line of feminine products to be marketed in a nationwide chain of boutiques called Beautiful You. So potent and effective are these devices that women by the millions line up outside the stores on opening day and then lock themselves in their room with them and stop coming out. Except for batteries. Maxwell's plan for battery-powered world domination must be stopped. But how?

From the Hardcover edition.

From Publishers Weekly

May 26, 2014 – Palahniuk (Fight Club; Doomed) continues to push limits in this satire of sex and consumerism, in which "the Nerd's Cinderella," Penny Harrigan, finds her average self in bed with tech megabillionaire Cornelius Linus Maxwell, dubbed "Climax-well," the greatest lover ever known. What begins as Penny's shy sexual exploration quickly becomes experimenting for Maxwell's research into pleasure products. While enduring erotically induced comas and life-threatening orgasms, Penny moves up the social ladder, meeting Max's former lovers, actress Alouette D'Ambrosia, and U.S. President Clarissa Hind. But as he did with his previous lovers, Maxwell dumps Penny on exactly day 136 of their relationship, and then releases his Beautiful You personal care products to the public a revolutionary event that marks men's obsolescence and turns women into titillated zombies. While women withdraw to their rooms for days and weeks, Penny learns that Max has much more power than anyone realizes. Men in suits following Penny and a Nepalese sex witch discuss the power of trends and brands, and the choice of self-pleasure over intimate human contact all contribute to Palahniuk's satire. His cheeky wit is at its best in this grotesque novel; his semi-erotic writing is efficacious and there are some downright beautiful scenes.

Customer Reviews


This was the worst thing I've ever read. Not shocking, not sexy, not even clever. Awful.

I could not hate this book more

Not interesting. Not shocking. Not even funny or clever. It's like a 13 year old's short story stretched into a full length piece of crap. Sorry chuck. I love your other books. But this was just awful.

Couldn't put down

Crude and brilliant. Feminism controlled by man.

Beautiful You
View in iTunes
  • $10.99
  • Available on iPhone, iPad, iPod touch, and Mac.
  • Category: Fiction & Literature
  • Published: Oct 21, 2014
  • Publisher: Knopf Doubleday Publishing Group
  • Seller: Penguin Random House LLC
  • Print Length: 240 Pages
  • Language: English
  • Requirements: This book can only be viewed on an iOS device with Apple Books on iOS 12 or later, iBooks 1.3.1 or later and iOS 4.3.3 or later, or a Mac with iBooks 1.0 or later and OS X 10.9 or later.

Customer Ratings