If You are Angry Now, You are not in Love
This book can be downloaded and read in Apple Books on your Mac or iOS device.
“We love ourselves loving others. We love our desires reflected on the lake called others and love ownership and pleasure. What we love is not others but ourselves drunk in love.”
This book provides us with a new perspective on love. The author shows that what we have thought of as love is actually no more than “Self-Love” through real examples. The author argues that the love we are dreaming of is nothing more than another expression of self-satisfaction needs. What I love is not “you” but “I who love you.” Also, the reason we sacrifice ourselves for love is that the love partner is basically an extension of self-existence. We, not being able to free ourselves from the yoke of ‘Self-Love’, get angry and quarrel with the partner even while loving each other.
For true love, we need to have the in-depth introspection of our inner selves, says the author. At the moment when we discover that the selfish desire is obsessively adsorbed behind love, our love can be born again.
1. Two-fly love
We love you but don’t love you
The lie that “I am yours”
2. If we are angry now, we are not in love
Love makes me angry
The illusion that I am sacrificing myself
Special expectation and special anger
The monster in me
The mechanism of anger
3. Loneliness cannot be avoided
Who made me lonely
We want to be connected and disconnected
Loneliness is not a fact but feeling
4. Ignorant love is violence
Coercion for you
The double standard
Speaking without speaking
5. Do not demand from humans more than what humans can do
The compulsion of being flawless
Love does not force change
There was a good reason
6. We cannot make others happy
A promise that cannot be kept
The compulsion to make your spouse happy
Keeping the boundary of the mind
The right to be depressed
7. Possible love
8. Two hearts in contact leave scars
Scars from the past cannot hurt me
The cure of juxtaposition
9. Love is still valid
My dignity does not require grounds
Strength of mind
Love is still valid
A Great Read!
This book became the momentum for me to reflect on myself who behaved as I like and was selfish. Since I read this book, my relationships with others have been gradually changing. I recommend this book to those who want to make new relationships through enlightenment.