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This Book Is Full of Spiders

Seriously, Dude, Don't Touch It

David Wong

This book is available for download with iBooks on your Mac or iOS device, and with iTunes on your computer. Books can be read with iBooks on your Mac or iOS device.

Description

From the writer of the cult sensation John Dies at the End comes another terrifying and hilarious tale of almost Armageddon at the hands of two hopeless heroes.

WARNING:

You may have a huge, invisible spider living in your skull. THIS IS NOT A METAPHOR.

You will dismiss this as ridiculous fear-mongering. Dismissing things as ridiculous fear-mongering is, in fact, the first symptom of parasitic spider infection -- the creature secretes a chemical into the brain to stimulate skepticism, in order to prevent you from seeking a cure. That's just as well, since the "cure" involves learning what a chainsaw tastes like.

You can't feel the spider, because it controls your nerve endings. You can't see it, because it decides what you see. You won't even feel it when it breeds. And it will breed. So what happens when your family, friends and neighbors get mind-controlling skull spiders? We're all about to find out.

Just stay calm, and remember that telling you about the spider situation is not the same as having caused it.  I'm just the messenger. Even if I did sort of cause it.

Either way, I won't hold it against you if you're upset. I know that's just the spider talking.

Publishers Weekly Review

Aug 20, 2012 – Cracked.com editor Jason Pargin's alter ego Wong returns with a sequel to the cult classic John Dies at the End. The 25-year-old John is very much alive in this book, less drunk than last we saw him (though not for lack of trying), and joined by David's loyal dog, Molly, and his freckle-faced, one-handed fiancée, Amy. Together they battle an infestation of spider-like monsters that lodge themselves in their victim's mouths, take control of their bodies, and wreak havoc on the town of "Undisclosed." Not all the monsters are as easy to spot as the "shambling meat" marauders, such as the man-shaped monster with skewered turkey appendages or the anus-gouging ground-tunneler they call Carlos. Shadow men appear, John hits the "Soy Sauce," his dangerous drug of choice, and even the government quarantine team led by David's court-ordered therapist might pose more of a threat than the zombie contagion (as infected humans prey on people, and can survive massive traumas, the group decides that "zombie" is the best term). This phantasmagoria of horror, humor—and even insight into the nature of paranoia, perception, and identity—heralds the film adaptation of its predecessor; directed by Bubba Ho-Tep and Phantasm auteur Don Coscarelli, it premiered at the 2012 Sundance Film Festival.

Customer Reviews

Amazing

David Wong is hilarious, disgusting, and scary in his writings, but this book is so hard to put down. As a squeamish young 20-something, I would cringe and squeal then turn the page to read what was next. Be prepared to think a lot about reality, big philosophy questions, and boners.

Amazing

I never thought anything could top "John Dies at the End" but this book manages to accomplish that. Very few works of fiction can simultaneously be both horrifying, and hilarious, and David Wong manages to repeat the incredible feat again in "This Book is Full of Spiders." The book is also much more than it appears. It dwells on some deep topics, and manages to disguise the philosophy lesson as entertainment. Read it.

A creepy roller coaster.

Amazing. I don't want to spoil, so I'll just say that the story keeps moving and engages you from the get go. You can't put the book down. Get it, read it, and fall in love with the grotesque and horrifying town of Undisclosed!

This Book Is Full of Spiders
View In iTunes
  • $9.99
  • Available on iPhone, iPad, iPod touch, and Mac.
  • Category: Horror
  • Published: Oct 02, 2012
  • Publisher: St. Martin's Press
  • Seller: Macmillan / Holtzbrinck Publishers, LLC
  • Print Length: 384 Pages
  • Language: English
  • Requirements: To view this book, you must have an iOS device with iBooks 1.3.1 or later and iOS 4.3.3 or later, or a Mac with iBooks 1.0 or later and OS X 10.9 or later.

Customer Ratings

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