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Coming Out, Becoming Whole, and Living Free from Shame

This book can be downloaded and read in iBooks on your Mac or iOS device.


Vicky Beeching, called “arguably the most influential Christian of her generation” in The Guardian, began writing songs for the church in her teens. By the time she reached her early thirties, Vicky was a household name in churches on both sides of the pond. Recording multiple albums and singing in America’s largest megachurches, her music was used weekly around the globe and translated into numerous languages.

But this poster girl for evangelical Christianity lived with a debilitating inner battle: she was gay. The tens of thousands of traditional Christians she sang in front of were unanimous in their view – they staunchly opposed same-sex relationships and saw homosexuality as a grievous sin. Vicky knew if she ever spoke up about her identity it would cost her everything.

Faced with a major health crisis, at the age of thirty-five she decided to tell the world that she was gay. As a result, all hell broke loose. She lost her music career and livelihood, faced threats and vitriol from traditionalists, developed further health issues from the immense stress, and had to rebuild her life almost from scratch.

But despite losing so much she gained far more: she was finally able to live from a place of wholeness, vulnerability, and authenticity. She finally found peace. What’s more, Vicky became a champion for others, fighting for LGBT equality in the church and in the corporate sector. Her courageous work is creating change in the US and the UK, as she urges people to celebrate diversity, live authentically, and become undivided.

From Publishers Weekly

Apr 23, 2018 – In this heartfelt, honest debut, Beeching tells the story of growing up evangelical in the U.K., going to college, and scoring a major Christian recording deal all while knowing she was gay and doing her best to pretend otherwise. Beeching knew from her early teens that she liked girls and didn't like boys. Her church preached that homosexuality was "an abomination," but no matter what Beeching did answering an altar call, joining the Christian youth organization True Love Waits, attending an evangelical seminary, going out on plenty of dates with men, denying herself as a sexual being altogether she was unable to stop having feelings for other women. Beeching's prose flows easily as she tells a straightforward story of coming to terms with her sexuality and coming out. The narrative reveals her relief in living out her true identity, but also the complications her honesty caused. Readers will be heartbroken as Beeching describes being unable to enjoy her incredible musical success and revel in her strong faith because of concerns about her sexuality a sorrow that led her to contemplate suicide. Christian young adults with questions about sexual identity in relation to their faith will find Beeching's memoir illuminating, and all readers will relate to her earnest struggle against the pressure to conform to impossible expectations.

Customer Reviews

Undivided is the BEST book I’ve ever read!

Whether you’re an LGBTQ+ Christian, or whether you’re a pastor, or whether you’re just curious about what the Bible truly says about same-sex relationships, this book is a MUST READ. She is so raw and open, and honest about the crippling journey she went through, to arrive at the other end of the tunnel empowered, and in her most authentic skin. This book is heartbreakingly raw, breathtakingly beautiful, and it is a display of truth, courage and vulnerability at their finest. It is the best book, I have ever read.

Relatable Content Alert

As someone who came from an extremely religious upbringing and then at the age of 28 coming out at Trans/Non Binary I resonated with almost the entirety of this book.
I’ve been told I was an abomination.
I’ve been cast out for standing up for equality.
I’ve also found love and acceptance with my chosen family.
Vicky’s traumas that caused depression and anxiety are all too real for me. There’s not a night that goes by where I can sleep through without waking up to my heart pounding out of my chest in fear from the damage done long ago. While it’s unfortunate that she has gone through all of this, it’s comforting to know I’m not alone.
Thank you, Vicky, for writing this book, for sharing your most personal story with us all.
The world needs more courageous people like you. Thank you, again.

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  • $12.99
  • Available on iPhone, iPad, iPod touch, and Mac.
  • Category: Biographies & Memoirs
  • Published: Jun 12, 2018
  • Publisher: HarperOne
  • Print Length: 304 Pages
  • Language: English
  • Requirements: To view this book, you must have an iOS device with iBooks 1.5 or later and iOS 4.3.3 or later, or a Mac with iBooks 1.0 or later and OS X 10.9 or later.

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