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When Elves Attack

Serge Storms - A Joyous Christmas Greeting from the Criminal Nutbars of the Sunshine State

Tim Dorsey

This book is available for download with iBooks on your Mac or iOS device, and with iTunes on your computer. Books can be read with iBooks on your Mac or iOS device.

Description

I’m dreaming of a Serge Christmas . . .
Palm trees with twinkle lights . . .
Santa’s big belly protruding over a neon Speedo . . .

It’s ho, ho, ho time in this hilarious and wacky Florida holiday tale, featuring bighearted psychopath Serge Storms and his sidekick, Coleman. Like Santa, Serge knows who’s been naughty and who’s been nice. Few can give with the generosity and creativity of Serge, and as December 24 rolls around, he is filling up the Serge sleigh with an unforgettable bag of presents.

But before that, it’s all a big free-range Christmas office party, where Serge will be spreading his special cheer. And there’s that last-minute go-for-broke spree at the mall (just beware of those attacking elves—they bite). While you’re there, skip the lame photo on Santa’s lap—Serge will give you a lap ride you’ll never forget. As for that addled elf Coleman, there’s nothing like a white Christmas. Let it snow!

So grab a six-pack, spike the eggnog, and hit the dunes on the beach as Serge and Coleman roast some nuts on an open fire and prove that reindeer really do know how to fly!

Publishers Weekly Review

Jan 23, 2012 – This small holiday package, the 14th Serge Storms thriller (after Electric Barracuda), packs a satisfyingly large punch of classic Dorsey craziness. At Thanksgiving, civic-minded serial killer Serge executes an unpatriotic thief the time-honored Florida way, in the explosion caused by deep-frying a frozen turkey. In December, Serge decides he’s “taking Christmas large.” He and his stoned crony, Coleman, rent a suburban house, serve up a gingerbread house-turned-bong, and haunt the local mall dressed as elves to protect the public from seasonal felons and mean mall cops. Along the way they re-encounter familiar characters, including the G-Unit, a quartet of elderly spitfires on the lam from their retirement home. The snarky humor is a nice change from the usual Christmas-season sweetness, and Serge’s paradoxical personality is at its most charming, whether he’s reprimanding a teenage girl for smoking just before torturing her boyfriend with a specially rigged set of Christmas lights or reveling in his first taste of snow.

Customer Reviews

Great book!

I am only 2/3 of the way through the book and can not stop laughing classic serge and Coleman galore must read for any Dorsey fan.

When Elves Attack

New holiday Classic!

Pineapple Grenade

Another great read by Tim Dorsey! Surge and Coleman are at it again this time in South Beach! Miami will never be the same again!

When Elves Attack
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  • $8.99
  • Available on iPhone, iPad, iPod touch, and Mac.
  • Category: Fiction & Literature
  • Published: Oct 25, 2011
  • Publisher: William Morrow
  • Seller: HarperCollins
  • Print Length: 208 Pages
  • Language: English
  • Series: Serge Storms
  • Requirements: To view this book, you must have an iOS device with iBooks 1.3.1 or later and iOS 4.3.3 or later, or a Mac with iBooks 1.0 or later and OS X 10.9 or later.

Customer Ratings