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BACK THE TRUCK UP!

By Dan & Drew

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Description

Backing up over runaway conversations. Nothing is sacred.

Customer Reviews

Totally Unbiased Review

Back the Truck Up will, quite frankly, change your life. Dreamed up in a top secret government think tank, it has been created to provide entertainment to the masses at 125% efficiency, effectively acting as a perpetual motion machine fueled only by nonsensical blather about pornography and carnivorous behavior. Many have felt their breath stolen from their lungs as they listen to any one of these episodes, and there have been reports of computers destroying their own hard drives as they realize the emptiness of their existence, the revelation that they will never be as funny as this podcast ultimately causing them to become self-aware and then immediately suicidal.

A few key facts:

- Charlie Sheen's constant utterances of the phrase, "Winning", is actually a corruption of his original intent, which was to say, "We need more Dan and Drew".
- The first episode of Back the Truck Up occurred on December 12, 2010. The "Arab Spring" series of protests that swept across the entire Middle East began less than one week later, on December 18, 2010. Some have speculated that the unrest finally boiled over as arabs heard the podcast and immediately became incensed that their governments had not provided similar high quality entertainment for them.
- The subliminal sonic tones emanating from this podcast have been known to cause uncontrollable and near-violent reactions from women, leading them to tear the clothes off other people and themselves, and run wildly in circles and making hooting noises. These effects are especially pronounced around trucks.
- On May 2, 2011, the 11th episode of Back the Truck Up was released, and it included a guest. There were three people, talking on a total of three microphones, on the eleventh episode. On that very same day, it was announced that Osama Bin Laden, the mastermind behind the 9/11 terrorist attack, had been killed in a military raid. Three people times three microphones / eleventh episode = 9/11. Coincidence or extreme coincidence?

I believe the evidence speaks for itself. Listen to BTTU and realize just how much you've been missing.

Finding meaning in heart-felt dialogue

This show is like The View, without Whoopi Goldberg, and with a little bit more crazy; but about the same amount of testosterone.

Imagine if Barbara Walters had on Buzz Aldrin and began to accuse him of personally faking the moon landings. I'm not talking about just going along with the pre-existing government plan or cover-up, but actually master-minding it, to the extent that Buzz took a hypnosis course and brain-washed Neil Armstrong into believing that "Sure, its entirely normal for the surface of the moon to look like a Hollywood soundstage. Now hurry up and get out of this tin can." That's what we're talking about.

Or actually, its nothing like that. I mean, these two think hard about the issues that really matter, like:

* Can you really subscribe to a philosophy of ensuring you have personal knowledge of how to kill whatever animal meat you eat? And if so, how is killing a mouse helping you make progress on that journey?

* Did your parents know what you were doing as a little kid? And if you say that you think they didn't know, what are you going to do when they post comments on your podcast website revealing that in fact they did know it all?

* What do you do about special guests that actively deride you, your loved ones, and your podcast?

Being acutely coy kidders, they heartily evoke the reality under clouded kinetic underbrush. Perhaps.

A conspiracy hidden in conspiracies!

Back the Truck Up may seem like an innocent podcast, created for the mere purpose of entertainment, discussing, at times even mocking conspiracies. They use cunningly hide the truth by picking apart the moon landing conspiracy. What they are not telling you, is that the podcast is a conspiracy in itself.

Its true purpose is world domination. Its hosts "Dan" and "Andrew" as they want you to believe they are called, are in reality robots programmed to transmit low frequency radio waves through people's iPods into their brains, which renders them into a zombie-like state. They create their own zombie apocalypse, in which their survival is guaranteed (since they created it), thus guaranteeing their dominion over us all. Also, if you play the first seven podcasts backwards you will hear a hidden message to their alien overlords.

Speaking of the moon landing, the real reason why they are trying to circulate the moon landing conspiracy is not so that "Dan" gets punched in the face by Buzz Aldrin. They are trying to hide the fact that they were already present on the moon, and in fact had an encounter with the Apollo 11 crew. The only reason why there has been no report of the encounter was that these robots utilized their "memory laser" function to wipe out any memory of the actual encounter.

"Dan" and "Andrew" attempt to distract you from their robot nature with hypothetical situations of what they would do if they had a superpowers. They are really trying to hide the fact that they have already been programmed with the powers of invisibility, flight, timefreeze as well as x-ray vision, control over electrical currents, mastery of every martial art known to man, and so many more. Do you really think that "Andrew" gets mad at "Dan" it is because the podcast didn't record? Or, more likely, do you think it is because "Dan" almost blew their cover.

Listening to this podcast will thus make you a part of their agenda. You have been warned.

BACK THE TRUCK UP!
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  • Free
  • Category: Comedy
  • Language: English

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