You're Making It Worse
By You're Making It Worse
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Although performing stand-up comedy was what initially united Eliot, Brent, and H. Alan over 10 years ago, it’s their openness (and sense of humor) about feeling totally lost and disconnected from the gay community that’s truly bonded them. On YMIW, Eliot, Brent and H. Alan get down and dirty, exploring the good, bad, and ugly tropes of contemporary gay life, often the stuff that no one -- especially straight people -- discuss for fear of being labeled homophobic. (Don’t worry. They’ll do that for you.) Each episode features a special guest -- comedians, humorists, musicians, influencers, film/TV writers, journalists, politicians, etc. - as well as allies, enemies, and acquaintances from all backgrounds and professions, not just those in the public eye. And as white, urban-dwelling gay dudes in their thirties, Eliot, Brent and H. Alan check their own privilege at the door, eager to instead explore what life looks for those not afforded the same concessions.
||ExplicitDavid Smithyman||On today's episode, Brent and H. Alan attempt to calm Eliot after his visceral reaction to a story in the New York Times about a very rich, politically active married gay couple in Manhattan who have become full-fledged, MAGA hat-wearing Trump supporters: when, how, and UGH WHYYY? Then, Fresh off the Boat writer and shame-filled Australian David Smithyman talks to the guys about the enigma of the gay nightlife industry, including the unintentionally hilarious jibberish used by party promoters to seduce (and confuse?) potential partygoers to venues like Club Toilet, a real place. And the guys talk parenthood: who wants kids, how soon, and, also, vaginally?||12/6/2018||Free||View in iTunes|
||ExplicitMatt McConkey||If two girls kiss on camera and it's broadcast on the Macy's Thanksgiving Day parade, does anyone care? As it turns out...yep. Ugh. Then, Matt McConkey of the podcast Homophiliajoins Brent, Eliot and H. Alan to talk about etiquette of sending nudes, the nightmare that is Datalounge, and the shitstorm of blackmail via Grindr, which helped oust a 20-year-old city councilman in Texas. And, finally, the guys talk about the benefits of therapy and whether or not you should be a dick to your shrink.||11/29/2018||Free||View in iTunes|
||ExplicitMarquita Robinson||First, the guys talk about which gay lingo needs to be retired -- zaddy, mary, kween -- and whether or not the Alyssa Edwards-inspired tongue pop is past its prime. Then, Marquita Robinson, writer for GLOW, You're the Worst, and New Girl, joins the guys to talk about her experience navigating different spaces as a bisexual woman growing up between Okinawa and Oklahoma. Then, Brent, Eliot and H. Alan see green when they talk about how much weed they smoke, respectively, and whether or not "the war on drugs" actually had a lasting impact or if it's just another reason to hate the Reagans.||11/15/2018||Free||View in iTunes|
||ExplicitNaomi Ekperigin and Andy Beckerman||A Star is Born continues to shine and certainly feels like the gayest event of 2018. Should we care? Do we stan for Gaga? Better yet, so we stan for Andrew Dice Clay??? Then, Naomi Ekperigin and Andy Beckerman, hosts of podcast and live show Couples Therapy, join Brent, Eliot and H. Alan to talk about coupling up just in time for "cuffing season." And finally, WHO DRESSED UP FOR HALLOWEEN? Uploaded just in time to start thinking about Halloween 2019!||11/8/2018||Free||View in iTunes|
||ExplicitGarrett Watts||Should we care about STD's? You might be surprised by Brent, Eliot and H. Alan's answers. Then, influencer Garrett Watts talks about living life on YouTube and how the most dramatic proclamation of queerness might just be...not proclaiming it at all. And when it comes to sleeping habits, whose quirks are the weirdest? Is it Brent because he sleeps on five pillows? Probably, but you should still listen through the end anyway.||11/1/2018||Free||View in iTunes|
||ExplicitLiza Dye||After watching Republican senator Lindsay Graham throw a hissy fit of epic proportions at the Brett Kavanaugh hearing (and later berating Dr. Blasey Ford's testimony on Twitter), the guys debate whether or not it's fair to publicly tease the lifelong bachelor, as Rosie O'Donnell did when she called him a "closeted idiot." Then, comedian and "chapstick lesbian" Liza Dye joins Brent, Eliot and H. Alan to try and figure out why lesbians can't get ONE goddamn bar. Is that so much to ask? Finally, how do the guys feel about theme parks, and which of your co-hosts is afraid of roller coasters (spoiler alert: it's one of the Jewish ones).||10/25/2018||Free||View in iTunes|
||ExplicitGaby Dunn||Now that Taylor Swift is officially "political" and speaking out for gay rights -- among other causes -- should we be excited, especially since she may very well have caused a spike in voter registration among America's youngest? Then, Brent, Eliot, and H. Alan welcome writer-performer-LGBTQ activist and host of the podcast BAD WITH MONEY Gaby Dunn to talk about a whole bunch of stuff: coming out in public, how finances are different for queer people, and whether or not Boston is filled with racists. And finally, hear a REAL clip of 10-year-old Eliot on Wheel of Fortune when the guys talk about their game shows, and who would SWEEP on Jeopardy.||10/18/2018||Free||View in iTunes|
||ExplicitMatthew Dempsey||John Travolta: movie icon, devout Scientologist, and HUGE fan of male masseuses. But is he a closet case trolling the gay community, as Eliot sees it? Or is it not really our business, as H. Alan insists? And has Brent even SEEN Grease??? Then, gay psychotherapist and YouTube lightning rod Matthew Dempsey talks to the guys about treating a mostly gay male clientele, as well as his video about "pretty privelege" which single-handedly broke the internet, or at least the gay parts. And finally, the guys get sentimental talking about their pets -- even Brent, whose parents dog Prince gets "all the smoochies."||10/11/2018||Free||View in iTunes|
||ExplicitTravon Free||Grindr launched Kindr, a campaign to encourage a more inclusive atmosphere among users. Will it work? The guys investigate. Then, writer Travon Free joins Brent, Eliot and H. Alan to talk about his experience as a bisexual Black dude, including the double-edged sword that is "passing." And, finally, find out which of the guys moisturizes, AND who wants a nose job!||10/4/2018||Free||View in iTunes|
||ExplicitSara Benincasa||Are Bert and Ernie MORE than just "roommates?" A gay writer for Sesame Street says that when he wrote on the show, he did so under the assumption that they were, indeed, a couple. Sesame Workshop officially said that's untrue. So who should we believe? Then, writer, comedian, and "bisexual princess" Sara Benincasa joins the guys to dissect the myth of the F*g Hag and whether or not throwing your bachelorette party at gay bars will make you the life of the party or the reason to leave. Finally, former Crossfitters H. Alan and Eliot debate the merits of the fitness phenomenon, while Brent...doesn't.||9/27/2018||Free||View in iTunes|
||ExplicitJoe Mande||First up, Brent, Eliot and H. Alan discuss the nature of FABULOUSNESS, the focus of a book by writer Madison Moore. Just what does it mean to be fabulous? Who is, who isn't, and what happens when Brent slips into a pair of kitten heels? Then, comedian and The Good Place writer Joe Mande joins the guys to talk about the nature of offending people. The guys even do a live read of a "missing" scene from Home Improvement, courtesy of Joe. Then, the guys take the time (!) to discuss watches.||9/20/2018||Free||View in iTunes|
||ExplicitKara Klenk||First, the guys weigh the pros and cons of annual gay pride celebrations around the world, which really boils down to one question: are parades THE WORST? Then, Brent, Eliot, and H. Alan all discuss the movie Book Club with comedienne Kara Klenk, host of the podcast Let's Talk About Texts. Even with A-listers Jane Fonda, Candice Bergen, Diane Keaton and Mary Steenburgen (or, as Brent pronounces it, "Steerburger"), this baffling, campy comedy toes the line between being bad good and bad BAD. By the end of the movie, we learn that Diane Keaton's character is named...Diane, which should give you a sense of how little sense the movie makes. And finally, the guys discuss country music, which includes H. Alan's...unforgettable impression of Carrie Underwood. Unforgettable. Yeah, let's go with that.||9/13/2018||Free||View in iTunes|
||ExplicitLex, Esq.||Brent, Eliot and H. Alan triumphantly break down an ACTUAL STUDY that details just how toxic Grindr can be for its users self-esteem. To stay on theme, Lex of YMIW's favorite blog The Problem Gays, commiserates with the guys about the epidemic of rejection among gay men: where we encounter it and how we react. And, finally, the guys explore the ultimate trifecta: underwear, pajamas and robes! Who wears what and, incidentally, does a single heterosexual man know what Andrew Christian is?||9/6/2018||Free||View in iTunes|
||ExplicitKiran Gandhi||First, the guys talk about Masterpiece Cakeshop of Colorado, where Christian baker Jack Phillips refused to bake a cake for a gay couple, a case that made its way to the Supreme Court. (Fun fact: the same guy LATER refused to bake a cake for a transgender woman, just as Jesus would have wanted!) Then, Kiran Gandhi of the project Madame Gandhi and drummer for M.I.A. and Kehlani, proves what makes her impossibly cool: she's a queer feminist activist, TED talk speaker, and Gap ad model whose story went viral when she "free bled" while running the 2015 London marathon. And when it comes to s****y first jobs, Brent and H. Alan can't hold a candle to Eliot's bizarre, endless list of 25 part-time gigs at Talbots, McDonald's, and an Entenmann's factory where he was driven to tears after being subjected to a 24/7 loop of attack birds squawking: an "eco-friendly" method of keeping rats out of the parking lot. It didn't work, but at least we can all laugh about it together.||8/30/2018||Free||View in iTunes|
||ExplicitJaboukie Young-White||Is a Log Cabin (read: gay) Republican a bad person? What if he manages a CVS and calls the cops on a Black customer using a coupon he doesn't recognize? Because, yes, THAT JUST HAPPENED in Chicago. Next, comedian and twunk-in-progress Jaboukie Young-White joins Brent, Eliot and H. Alan to break down Grindr "tribes:" bear, clean-cut, daddy, discreet, geek, jock, leather, otter, poz, rugged, trans, and twink. Collect 'em all! And finally, BUCKLE UP as the guys talk CARS!||8/23/2018||Free||View in iTunes|
||ExplicitGabe Liedman||Brent, Eliot and H. Alan ask if it's okay to be gay and eat at Chik-fil-A, the fast food chain known for donating millions to an anti-gay political organization...and also THEIR DELICIOUS CHICKEN! Then, comedian and writer Gabe Liedman joins the guys to discuss why they love the women they do, from old standards (Liza, Barbra, Madonna) to sleeper hits (Debbie Gibson, Rita Rudner, Countess LuAnn) to Black lesbian (!) Republican (!!) coke-head (!!!) Nell Carter, the star of Dreamgirls and Gimme A Break!whose clitoris is the stuff of LEGEND. Good luck finding ANOTHER podcast where four adult men fan out over Supreme Court Judge Elena Kagan, 9/11 truther Christine Ebersole, and Anne "You ARE The Weakest Link, goodbye!" Robinson. And finally, the guys talk about -- cue "Valley Girl voice" -- THE MALL, which H. Alan passionately argues is "the best place to m********e," a revelation that baffles his co-hosts.||8/16/2018||Free||View in iTunes|
||ExplicitGeorgia Hardstark||My Favorite Murder's Georgia Hardstark nerds out with fellow true crime aficionados Brent and H. Alan, while Eliot conflates JonBenet, pineapples, and more||8/9/2018||Free||View in iTunes|
||ExplicitMamrie Hart||First, Brent, Eliot and H. Alan wonder if saying "f*g" automatically makes a straight person homophobic, as actor Lakeith Stanfield did while "rapping in character" (ugh) in a now-deleted Instagram video. Then, renaissance woman Mamrie Hart (and her beloved lap dog Beanz) talk BDE: Big Dick Energy, a specific type of confidence made famous by Ariana Grande's future ex-husband Pete Davidson. Is BDE real, and who has it: Obama? Rihanna? ...BEANZ? And finally, the guys talk about air conditioning, which dictates Eliot's life so much that he's even refused a FREE trip to Israel with H. Alan. It may be The Promised Land, but without central air, how great can it really be?||8/2/2018||Free||View in iTunes|
||Explicit10: Colton Haynes||First, the guys discuss the value of IRL-intimidation-as-protest, and whether or not it would be cool to kick Sarah Huckabee Sanders out of a Taco Bell. Colton Haynes then joins Brent, Eliot and H. Alan to talk about Boyfriend Twins: men who date someo...||7/26/2018||Free||View in iTunes|
||Explicit9: Lena Dunham||Eliot, the ultimate masochist, inflicts the ultimate clickbait on an unenthused Brent and H. Alan: a viral story about a 19-year-old guy who posted about going to the hospital after sucking a 10" dick. (Great job, Gay Media.) Then, Lena Dunham teaches ...||7/19/2018||Free||View in iTunes|
||Explicit8: Louis Virtel||The guys debate whether Grindr's sharing of user data actually matters in the age of sex tapes and Cambridge Analytica, which should definitely be someone's drag name. Then, writer/comic/podcaster and gif-able Jeopardy! contestant Louis Virtel ...||7/12/2018||Free||View in iTunes|
||Explicit7: Danny Pellegrino||First, the guys disembowel the unnerving argument by the New York Times that we're living in "the age of the twink." UGH. Then, Danny Pellegrino of the podcast EVERYTHING ICONIC helps break down exactly what constitutes as "camp" these days, from Count...||7/5/2018||Free||View in iTunes|
||Explicit6: Sabrina Jalees||First, the guys try to figure out who Rita Ora is, and if we should be mad at her for releasing a [terrible] anthem to bisexuality. Then, comedian and writer Sabrina Jalees explains why this Rita ("Who?") Ora person is offensive. Then, she tells the in...||6/28/2018||Free||View in iTunes|
||Explicit5: Amanda Seales||Eliot, Brent and H. Alan figure out if they like the Pope after he's nice to AT LEAST ONE gay! Then, Small Doses host Amanda Seales and the guys have a "spirited discussion" about what happens when white gay guys...borrow...from Black women. Yeah, "bor...||6/21/2018||Free||View in iTunes|
||Explicit4: NICOLE BYER||Eliot, Brent, and H. Alan talk about Trump's boner for a trans ban in the military. Then, quintuple-threat Nicole Byer then joins the guys to break down how lame it is when gay guys are like "Ew, vaginas!" and why that trope is SO tired and SO boring. ...||6/14/2018||Free||View in iTunes|
||Explicit2: ALASKA THUNDERFUCK||Eliot, Brent, and H. Alan analyze their feelings about the Queer Eye reboot upon the launch of season two, including Antoni's infamous avocado controversy. Alaska Thunderfuck joins the guys to break down how and why Drag Race not only changed his life,...||6/14/2018||Free||View in iTunes|
||Explicit3: MOSHE KASHER||Eliot, Brent, and H. Alan assess whether Barbara Bush was good for the gays, and whether it was cruel of George and Laura to name their own daughter Barbara. Moshe Kasher joins the guys to talk about the immediate polemic outrage that's recently follow...||6/14/2018||Free||View in iTunes|
||Explicit1: Ep 00 Who's making it worse?||Eliot, Brent, and H. Alan, three comedians and decade-long friends, explain the premise of the podcast, in which they complain, articulate, and argue about why being gay can often be EXHAUSTING. Each episode features a special guest (i.e. Alaska Thunde...||6/4/2018||Free||View in iTunes|
Funny podcast but.....
These guys make me laugh. I love their guests but whenever the interview gets good they cut them off to go back to talk about themselves. It’s very much like hanging out with my gay friend that at the end of the night they give me conversational blue balls.
I Love these Guys
They care about woman. I could weep, finally I’m accepted. I’m a woman, I’m a slut, I have sex with men! And I matter to these guys!
Brent and Elliot great, but..
H. Alan refuses, during EVERY debate, to ever be open to another opinion/perspective and comes across nauseatingly self righteous and combative (glaringly obvious at the beginning of the Travon Free episode). H Alan, challenge yourself to actually think through your co-hosts’ perspectives. There’s a way to express and defend yourself without being condescending.
Also at the beginning of the Travon episode, two of you immediately brought up the unlikelihood of Kindr being effective. Check your privilege here nonwhite noncis folx are hoping this IS effective so they are treated better; clearly it wouldn’t affect your experiences, so save your pessimism.